Chasing Meteors

 Spaulding Gray, the late, great monologuist talked of Perfect Moments in "Swimming to Cambodia," and I became somewhat obsessed with finding perfect moments of my own. And I have had my fair share.  Looking back at my life, there was a time when my best friend, the late, great Keith St. Aubyn and I sat in my Datsun B210 watching a lightning storm for what seemed like hours, and although we were teenagers at the time, we both seemed to understand that the conversation we had with the sky gods warring with one another was somehow transformative.  Of course, my wedding to Annie was perfect--ask anybody who was there--it was the greatest!  Finally having a pregnancy that advanced into the second trimester was a perfect relief.  Corey was the child that was meant to be after losing five before him. The actual birth of our children, especially Ellie who was almost born in my car on La Cienega as I raced to the hospital with Annie deep into labor.  Our birth plan went out the window, when there was no time for drugs.  Annie was a champ, and Ellie was very anxious to come into the world.  It was beautiful and perfect, even though it wasn't the plan.

I had a plan today. The Perseid Meteor Shower was supposed to be amazing tonight.  And I wanted to see if I could have a perfect moment under shooting stars, as I once had in Wyoming sitting cuddled up under a blanket on a lawn recliner with a beautiful girl named Barbi.  I never saw so many shooting stars as I did that night.  I've only seen a handful since that night.  I tried to get a group together to go see the meteors, but it's monsoon season here in Utah and the sky hasn't been particularly helpful to us this summer. So, it's overcast, and my people bailed.  But I had a plan. I twould take a nap at 8PM, set my alarm for 2AM when the sky was supposed to clear up and I would drive up the hill away from the lights of the city.

My day was spent thinking about the meteors and biding my time. I switched on the TV and watched a movie that somebody recommended called "Knox Goes Away."  It was really excellent.  Sort of a Memento feel to it with Michael Keaton directing and playing the lead. I wept a couple of times.  Then I hopped on Zoom because my friend James is testing out how to host games and we played some "Friendly Feud," not to be mistaken for Family Feud.  It was a good way to pass the time until I got to see the sky alight with fire.  Then, I went to see one of our company members, Sarah Shippobotham's one person show.  And I am so glad that I did. It was beautiful and vulnerable, and filled with humor and heart. It was sublime!  

I got home, took my late nap, and awoke to chase my stars.  As I drove, I saw lightning forking across the sky and got a little worried that I wouldn't be able to see the meteors.  So, I drove up the hill hoping to get above the pesky clouds.  As I drove in the dark, the only car on the road I saw a fox, a family of deer, and bright flashes of lightning.  And I was alone with my thoughts.  When my first marriage broke up after my kidney was removed (unrelated events but not really), I decided to go on a road trip to find myself.  Just me and my car and waking up every day and deciding where I wanted to go.  It was amazing.  I almost died in the Grand Canyon, I happened to be in three different cities where the Pittsburgh Pirates were playing and so got to see my team three times. And the aforementioned Wyoming star cuddle occurred.  That was a trip filled with perfect moments.  And mostly being alone on roads at night.  So that played in my head.  As did Sarah's play, as I thought of my own one person show that I created around the works of Henry David Thoreau.  That show got better when I created a prologue for it about my own journey. And I began wondering if there's a one person show that is just me, without the crutch of great literature.  Maybe.   

Anyway, I got to the summit and pulled over.  Got out of my car ready to receive the meteor shower I was promised, but it just wasn't there.  Too much lightning and too many clouds.  So, after a while I drove back towards my housing. Driving through an empty town is always sort of lovely.  Nobody around, just the buildings and the imagination of why these things exist.  Driving past the sleeping festival stages, so proud that I get to walk on those boards.  Then up the hill to "Trick Manor."  I pull into my parking spot and as I climb out of my car, a shooting star welcomes me. I look up for some time longer and see two more meteors.  Then I come inside and write of a pretty perfect day that didn't turn out at all like I hoped but was better for that.

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